Tonight's Stinker The Breach (2013-I Think)

Tonight's Stinker The Breach (2013-I Think) https://youtu.be/Rh1bvFfdccg?si=bKv1_1jOQeRwzFoz And what a stinker... It looks like somebody got an autofocus night vision camera for Christmas, and got with some neighborhood teens & decided to make a zombie movie.... So, these two teenage girls go up the country, get lost & their car breaks down... One of them goes looking for help, & runs afoul of zombies in shrink-wrap.... Then she runs into someone who can barely remember his lines explains (for a really long time) how a group of scientists tore a hole in the universe & opened the gate to hell.... (At this point, I quit paying attention...) Then, they keep adding more characters who can barely remember their lines, none of which are delivered with any real sincerity.... Really goofy stop motion monster shows up in the second half.... I'd say, maybe, 0.00001% better than any given Polonia Bros flick....

Tonight's Stinker: Shoot the Living and Pray for the Dead (1971)

Tonight's Stinker Shoot the Living and Pray for the Dead (1971) https://youtu.be/1j6fCW5jL1E?si=nDFQkeEUyW1VNqSJ Okay, so, I've always enjoyed a good Spaghetti Western, and I've always admired Klaus Kinski's prolific film career, being known just as much for his bmovies as he is for his art house movies, and with the advent of the internet, I learned Kinski made a few of these westerns... So, something I had to get outa my system... This turned out to be a mystery/suspense... The first half follows the formula of a group of people holed up in a bar, with a group of bad guys, the leader being especially sadistic, & tensions rise... It turn out, the gang robbed a bank, which is all over the telegraph lines, their guide for the desert has been murdered, & their bagman is way late... At the bar, a stranger offers to show them the way to Mexico in exchange for half their loot... The loot shows up, & the second half of the movie is pretty much the formula of people lost in the desert, not sure if they can trust their guide...

Tonight's Stinker: The Pumaman (1980)

Tonight's Stinker The Pumaman (1980) https://youtu.be/e59kuXC_bzA?si=7ifvL64j3OVj3HWy So, a million years ago, aliens gave the Aztecs a gold mask, promising Pumaman would protect it.... Present day London, Donald Pleasance leads a group of villains in black leather jumpsuits, who have stolen the mask & intend to use it to control the minds of world leaders... But first, an archeologist warns him about the Pumaman, whom he resolves to find & kill.... Cut to a professor out for a jog, reading about a rash of murders... He goes back to work, where he senses danger, & a Latino with super human strength attacks him & tosses him out a window, but he survives... Later on, the Latino shows up at his house, tells the professor he's the Pumaman, & tries to get him to try on a belt... The audio is pretty grating most of the time, but the disco & midi-synth soundtrack is amusingly goofy... Campy fun that manages to stay engaging most of the time...

Tonight's Stinker: Colossus and the Amazon Queen (1960)

Tonight's Stinker Colossus and the Amazon Queen (1960) https://youtu.be/9sYoYgL4rGo?si=37UnmucRabitywFk So, it opens with an organized brawl, Glauco wins is the last man standing, & everybody walks away happy... Later that night, Pirro, his untrustable friend is approached by a pair of shady sailors who talk him into getting him on the next boat in exchange for drinking money.... Next morning, they're on the boat, & well. one thing leads to another.... Eventually, they make it to an island where they find promised gold & a table with free food & wine that's been drugged... The sailors abandon them to be enslaved by the Amazons.... Of course, the Amazons have their own set of problems, with the two alphas at each others throats, & a queen who's bored & likes to stay drunk.... Meanwhile, an escaped Egyptian inventor plots everyone's escape..... There's also a dated joke about an effeminate group of men.... Mostly comedy, with really poorly placed big band swing music during fight scenes....

Tonight's Stinker: Hercules and the Masked Rider (1963)

Tonight's Stinker Hercules and the Masked Rider (1963) https://youtu.be/64zVVd29-hI?si=TTZNu7xVj8pEDdJ1 So, uh, instead of ancient Greece, it's 16th century Spain, & Hercules is not the main character.... And so I'm having trouble remembering the first third of the movie, because I was too busy trying to wrap my head around that... Okay, so, in 16th century Spain, a Duke chases some escaping serfs onto a Don's property... The Duke threatens war unless he marries the Don's daughter... Old & committed to peace, the Don capitulates... However, a soldier betrothed to the Dona returns the next day, quickly learns the truth, gets exiled, & falls in with some gypsies, & becomes the masked rider.... A bad film print, ripped from a bad VHS, & the dubbing gets grating at times....

Tonight's Stinker: MST3K 517: Beginning of the End (1957)

Tonight's Stinker MST3K 517: Beginning of the End (1957) http://www.badmovies.org/movies/beginend/ https://youtu.be/E8kc3Z7Dxok?si=qBfkZ7g1IEJ5c35L A small Illinois town is destroyed, & all the residents disappear... A well known reporterette smells a story & decides to investigate.... After getting some pictures, both she & the national guard are stumped, until someone mentions a grain silo that collapsed a few months earlier... Instead of going strait to the silo, the reporterette stops at an agricultural scientists laboratory to ask for directions... He takes her to the wrecked silos, where they discover giant man-eating locusts... Must admit, I've seen the first half of this stinker several times, but for one reason or another, wasn't able to watch the end... Mike & the Bots jabs tend to produce some amusing one liners...

5 Motorcycle Fears You Don't Have To Worry About | I Broke My Bike!!!