Tonight's Stinker: Doctor Syn(1937)

Tonight's Stinker Doctor Syn(1937) https://youtu.be/KVekeUEbrzc?si=GpdHKM5bmGDiabca The film opens with a group of pirates marooning a guy in blackface for his betrayal of Captain Clegg.... Twenty years later, there's a grave with his name on it outside a church run by Dr. Syn.... During a Sunday service, one of the parishioners gets a signal that revenuers are coming, & the service closes.... The revenuer is Capt. Collyer, who's been ordered to find smugglers.... He gets to chatting with the town's drunken doctor, who claims to have seen evil spirits around the marsh... Locals dismiss this as just the doctor being drunk, but the Captain believes these are the smugglers.... Dr. Syn & his gang must hastily change road signs to fool the soldiers..,.. But that's only the first problem.... The guy in blackface returns... The town's schoolteacher is the accountant for the gang, and starts getting nervous, while his least favorite student starts getting nosey.... This film is not very well lit in places, & the rapid fire English vernacular is kinda hard to keep up with... Still, it's an interesting take compared to the Disney version...

Tonight's Stinker: Princess of the Nile(1954)

Tonight's Stinker Princess of the Nile(1954) https://youtu.be/xO_m-FNfe9o?si=pyuGRgcisnflHYiE In the year 1249, the city of Hanwan, Egypt is overrun with Bedouins as a Persian prince stops for a visit... Debra Paget is leading a double life as an Egyptian princess & a dancer at a bar, while a shaman keeps her father doped just enough to cooperate with the Bedouin chief.... While escorting the prince through the streets, a riot breaks out, the Bedouin chief takes the opportunity to kill the prince's friend in hopes of getting permission to kill more Egyptians, but the princess sees him.... The prince finds out, but is alone against the Bedouins, so he gains the help of all the town's thieves.... Just over an hour long, fairly amusing.... Confusing at first, as you have modern American actors trying to speak in medieval vernacular.... Lots of goofy sword fights, & a few good excuses to show Debra Paget dancing in skimpy outfits....

Tonight's Stinker: Lightning Bolt (1966)

Tonight's Stinker Lightning Bolt (1966) https://youtu.be/VDV2wOzf0IU?si=ETX3x4Ccl6BA1ftP (OR HERE) https://youtu.be/Q2ajoQQA6-I?si=fnelKZY7IQSjhu_k We open with stock footage of a rocket that wants to go everywhere but up, then blows up.... The protagonist starts narrating that was frequent enough to say sabotage, & that a scientist speculating on some radioactive lasers in the area.... The scientist sets out to investigate on his own, & a woman at a nearby cabana watches & reports to a guy who does a really bad Boris Badenov impression.... With the help of a diver, the scientist finds something, but their dinghy blows up.... Next, we're in Washington where a trio of VIPs are discussing the situation, before introducing the female head of some fictitious agency....She sends an agent disguised as a millionaire playboy, who's not introduced until a few minutes later.... Italian 007 knockoff, kinda drags through the first hour, even in the action scenes, but sorta pays off in the last half hour.....

Tonight's Stinker: Crime Zone(1988)

Tonight's Stinker Crime Zone(1988) https://youtu.be/JHZnd5m5bqU?si=F3eesm0c00g5EiJs In a dystopic future, the police have set up a sting for a crook trying to hijack a truckload of weapons.... There's a shoot out & they catch him.... Next, a security guard with an attitude problem loses his job at a cryogenics warehouse.... He goes to a bar where he meets his old street gang, and the old leader tells him he never had a chance..... While at the bar, he falls for a state owned hooker.... She falls for him, & he convinces her to quit her job... Out of work in a tiered society, they turn to shoplifting & pickpocketing, which catches the attention of some guy who makes some big promises in exchange for a high end job... But he's not on the level, & their situation spirals out of control.... The action scenes are pretty cool, but the rest of the movie is pretty depressing.... More of a crime drama than sci-fi.... Most of the characters are pretty crass... From a decent VHS rip, the audio is not that good.....

Tonight's Stinker: The Glove(1979)

Tonight's Stinker The Glove(1979) https://youtu.be/5WZZtS2Ae5I?si=A0KAIQ0hHMnuKvyV OR HERE https://youtu.be/ORIKDF7d_tc?si=lUGyNltD1EcGTg7y Roosevelt Grier is an escaped con, who dons a riot suit & a five pound gauntlet, which he uses to hunt down a prison guard & bash him to death (along with his car).... We cut to John Saxon as a down on his luck bounty hunter spending the weekend with his daughter.... He later drops her off at school, as he narrates how he's behind on his alimony, & always on the verge of losing custody.... Of course, it's not coming up with the money that's the problem, but he's got a gamble bug... Grier finds out that Saxon is looking for him after passing out flyers & taunts him over the phone... Meanwhile, Saxon gets in a couple fights, shakes down an old lady, & gets burned in a poker game set up by his sleazy bookie, who runs a sleazy real estate agency....... Mostly about how the bounty hunter's life really sucks, padding what feels like a sub plot about a killer...

Tonight's Stinker: The Golem(1920)

Tonight's Stinker The Golem(1920) https://youtu.be/5cQXzHRQMf4?si=AoyYaTF6CfbevDNR A Rabbi is doing some astrology, & the stars tell him there's going to be a calamity.... Meanwhile, the emperor is kicking the Jews out of the ghetto for greed, snubbing Christian festivals & black magic, & sends a haughty squire to deliver the message.... The Rabbi asks the squire to make an appeal for him... The squire & the rabbi's daughter fall for each other.... The rabbi secretly sculpts a giant out of clay, then uses black magic to bring it to life.... He uses it for chores at first, while the villagers are freaked out at it.... The squire comes back with good news of an appeal, but the rabbi catches him groping his daughter, & sees her not resisting... The rabbi goes to a festival at the emperor's place to show off his golem & do some other tricks.... When the castle starts to collapse, the golem saves everyone, & the Jews are pardoned.... Not needing it anymore, the rabbi turns off the golem & tries to destroy it, but things go sideways when the rabbi's assistant finds out the daughter is having an affair with a stranger..... I had to pause this a lot because the subtitles happened to flash by pretty fast.... Pretty interesting take on the dangers of building an unnatural servant that turns on it's creator (considering)... Wouldn't surprise me if the platform shoes inspired Frankenstein....

Tonight's Stinker: 2019: After the Fall of New York(1983)

Tonight's Stinker 2019: After the Fall of New York(1983) https://youtu.be/X4-vUA3wbow?si=SrXHfOcxF7Oo3LxM It opens with some annoying midi/synth music that we're supposed to believe some guy on the street is playing with a trumpet..... A narrator explains how people have gone sterile following World War 3, & the predominant government experiments on the survivors.... Some soldiers dressed in black on horseback meet up with some gangsters in a New York street, & set about raiding a building to kill a bunch of people with nasty complexions... Then we cut to a desert, where a couple of cars are in a game of trying to kill each other while punk rockers cheer them on... The winner is our protagonist, & the prize is a male transvestite.... The hero sets him/her free, then gets abducted by a pair of guys in white uniforms... He's taken to Alaska, where a group of rebels have set up shop.... He's told there's one fertile woman left on Earth, & they want him to go get her with the help of a strongman & a guy who's mind is a map of Brooklyn (even though his name is Bronx, which is on the other side of the river).... They get into New York, but need to run through rat infested sewers to avoid gangs & soldiers, but ultimately get caught.... They escape, & end up getting help from a midget & an ape man...... The midi/synth scores in these Italian Maxploitation always gives me a headache.... Still, the the movie is pretty fast paced & enjoyable....